Very Serious Sources Report A Vanishing Chip Shop Queue Has Become 'Too Organised To Ignore'

An entirely imagined witness says the chip shop queue at dusk assembled with such discipline that it briefly resembled a military parade with vinegar.

Rumour merchants have leapt upon this, insisting the queue's dramatic half-turn near the sauce bottles is evidence of a broader undercover setup.

No one involved is thought to have confirmed anything, because this is a parody page and the queue itself may simply have been hungry and British.

A local observer noted that one customer kept changing position every few minutes, which has been interpreted by forum strategists as either 'stealth mechanics' or 'just waiting for curry sauce'.

If true, this would mark the first time a battered cod has been credited with advancing a major open-world conspiracy.